On Piers Morgan Life Stories a very emotional Cheryl Cole was fighting back the tears as she broke down talking about Ashley Cole and her close shave with death when she recently became ill.

 27 year old Cheryl revealed what happened to her leading up to her collapse at a photo shoot. One night after returning from holiday she had a couple of drinks but felt under the weather shortly after that. She only became concerned when her skin became painful to touch and her lips turned blue.

After she collapsed, a close friend advised her to have a blood test, it was then doctors discovered just how bad she really was. They then had to tell her the grim news that she may not survive. She said she felt as though she was dying and started thinking about her Will.

The X Factor judge also opened up about her divorce and wept over Ashley’s betrayal of her and their recent divorce. When asked why he chose to cheat with numerous other women, Cheryl said:

“I will never understand why it happened. Never. I just don’t get it. We still talk – just general stuff. For anybody that’s been through a divorce, it’s the worst thing in the world.

She added:

 “Right now it’s still fresh, it hasn’t been that long, it’s still raw. It does make you feel numb. I don’t recognise myself sometimes. It has been non-stop tears, just too much.”

However despite this being a bad year for her, Cheryl insists that she will move on and admitted that she is hoping her interview will help her do just that. She added:

“It has been the worst year, the worst in my life ever.

“You know what I want more than anything? Those last 10 seconds on New Year’s Eve’ I’m going to scream them.